SUISUI INBOX

[lifeban]

[this piece of shit and his basic bitch phone]

Comments

[lifeban]

[CHOKES.]

You weren't that rough.

[arm aside,]

[starcinoma]

[ just. this face. ]

[lifeban]

[...sighs and gives up on boxers, just dropping them.]

Come here?

[starcinoma]

[ she walks over.

...and stops to pull up the boxers for him. ]

[lifeban]

That wasn't why.

[reaching to coax her up with his existing hand. he wants to LEAN ON HER.]

[starcinoma]

Oh.

[ well, this is embarrassing. still, she leans into him, giving him enough support to do whatever he needs. ]

[lifeban]

[what he does is rest his head on her shoulder and brace himself for Using His Words

aeons help him. he'll even take help from Aha if it gets them through this.]

You're upset.

[starcinoma]

[ she provides as sturdy a foundation as she can, waits for him to ask something of her. and when he just leans down, resting his head on her shoulder-

she just deflates. ]

...wouldn't you be?

[ there's no sense in trying to deny it. she's not the most emotional member of the crew, she knows that, but- she feels like she's a bit justified, here. ]

[lifeban]

I would.

[he knows denying what they both know won't help. he'd rather die than seriously hurt a member of their little family. that's just who he is.]

But remember. I gave willingly. I gave you Cloudpiercer. I was egging you on the entire time.

[starcinoma]

You weren't egging me on! You were-

[ for once, stelle's voice raises a notch. words get stuck in her throat, impassioned, a pitch she's not used to wielding. she takes a deep breath, exhales, and it's clearly audible just how shaky she sounds. ]

...just because you were willing then doesn't mean you'll always be. I'm worried about- the next time.

[lifeban]

[that's- worrying. he withdraws enough to be able to see her face, trying to catch her jaw with his hand so she can't look away.]

If I don't want it next time, I'll say no.

[starcinoma]

[ she lets him catch her, and though her eyes slip away for a moment she even willingly looks up to him. right now, more than ever, she wants to cooperate with dan heng. ]

...it's scary how good it felt.

[lifeban]

...Yeah. It was.

[nudging their foreheads together, careful with his horns.]

But it will be okay.

[starcinoma]

[ she's not sure she believes that. but she nods anyway, resting against dan heng and sighing. ]

...right. It'll be okay.

[ she finally glances over to his arm. ]

Does it still hurt?

[lifeban]

Not really. Just the occasional ache. It's closed now.

[starcinoma]

...can I touch it?

[lifeban]

Go ahead. Let's sit?

[letting go of her chin.]

[starcinoma]

[ she nods, moving the extra foot or two to take a seat on his bed. she'll let him choose how close he wants to sit - just because she's been reassured doesn't mean she's still entirely sure about everything. ]

[lifeban]

[he sits right beside her, close enough for their thighs to touch, so There.]

[starcinoma]

[ ...at least that feels nice. reassuring. she quickly glances up to his eyes, double-checking permission before reaching up and running a finger along the stump. ]

...it's already grown back some. [ with a small bit of wonder to her voice- ] The cut was a few inches above here.

[ her finger rises up, traces a circle where cloudpiercer sawed through so recently. ]

[lifeban]

[oh. he swallows hard, but nods.]

I thought so, but I wasn't sure.

[starcinoma]

[ she's silent for a moment. she has to swallow on her end - has to lick her dry lips. finally, she says: ]

I'm glad. But... I feel weird, too.

[ she lifts her fingers - moves up to the healed skin where she left bites and welts and hickeys. ]

...I miss the marks.

[ soft. regretful. guilty. ]

[lifeban]

[looks at her for a moment. whatever he's thinking... well, it never really shows on his face, does it?

but he's tipping his head, baring his throat.]

[starcinoma]

[ she looks up at him. how else is she supposed to take that? but- ]

They'll hurt. I don't want to...

[ does she?

she can't say either way. that's the worst part of all. ]

[lifeban]

Lighter marks wouldn't. They'll disappear too, but you can make them as many times as you like.