[He'd been chewed on spectacularly by a massive undead thing then he'd been literally taken apart piece by excruciating piece and then made into a sentient pile of limbs and then had to be burnt into a crisp by Jing Yuan and then had to be put together halfway and humiliated and then had to beg for Blade to kill him and had to lie here and hide and fall into mara alone and in the dark as he screamed with a voice he didn't have and Dan Feng wants for once in his wretched life for someone to tell him he'll be okay.
He starts fingerspelling out Dan Heng's name. Gives up, and just fumbles his hands one over the other, in the vague shape of a maple leaf.]
[It's supposed to help, that's why he asked for it, so why does it make him feel worse to be comforted?
He presses his face into Dan Heng's shoulder, hands winding around his back, breath hitching wet- and then he turns his face and bites down at the crook of his neck, over fabric, as he tries to lean his weight and overbalance Dan Heng.]
[he. honestly gets it instantly, which is upsetting in its own way. his own hand on dan feng's back had subconsciously signed sun for jing yuan. even with jumbled, faint memories, it isn't a hard guess these days.]
I... should have helped. I was seeing things. Hallucinating. So I didn't realize...
[Dan Feng squirms a little bit so he's sitting on the morgue drawer AND wiping off his bloody throat on Dan Heng's clothes (thanks), bracketing Dan Heng's hips with his knees.
He leans in for what seems to be a kiss before he remembers himself.]
Don't look so surprised. [He stares at his own hands for a moment, before making the same sign Dan Heng did for] Jing Yuan told me I should ask before I do things to people. I do not understand this but it makes him happy.
[He leans in- to kiss Dan Heng chastely, a peck on the lips.] Does asking make you happy?
[He stares, openmouthed, and then averts his eyes from that smile because if he looks at it for more than 0.0004 seconds he will self-immolate and that is a very uncomfortable experience.]
I did not want you to see me like that. Or like this.
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Re: DAY 20 11PM
Dan Feng...
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Re: DAY 20 11PM
Stop that.
Re: DAY 20 11PM
He lifts his crusty blood-smeared hands, and says, in IPC standard sign:]
Kill me?
Re: DAY 20 11PM
...Is there no alternative?
[he can tell he's been suffering.]
Re: DAY 20 11PM
[He'd been chewed on spectacularly by a massive undead thing then he'd been literally taken apart piece by excruciating piece and then made into a sentient pile of limbs and then had to be burnt into a crisp by Jing Yuan and then had to be put together halfway and humiliated and then had to beg for Blade to kill him and had to lie here and hide and fall into mara alone and in the dark as he screamed with a voice he didn't have and Dan Feng wants for once in his wretched life for someone to tell him he'll be okay.
He starts fingerspelling out Dan Heng's name. Gives up, and just fumbles his hands one over the other, in the vague shape of a maple leaf.]
Hug?
Re: DAY 20 11PM
I'm here. I'm sorry.
Re: DAY 20 11PM
He presses his face into Dan Heng's shoulder, hands winding around his back, breath hitching wet- and then he turns his face and bites down at the crook of his neck, over fabric, as he tries to lean his weight and overbalance Dan Heng.]
Re: DAY 20 11PM
Re: DAY 20 11PM
leaning heavily on him though, gnawing on him for a good bit before just slumping against his chest.]
Re: DAY 20 11PM
stroking his hair, gentle.]
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Re: DAY 19 11PM
I saw it happen to another, though.
Re: DAY 19 11PM
Someone tried to heal me. And it was. [He turns his face into Dan Heng's skin.] It was wrong. She healed me like how Yaoshi would.
Re: DAY 19 11PM
I'm so sorry.
Re: DAY 19 11PM
He killed me. Had to. Hurt.
[Blade's handsign is immediate, though if it made sense to anyone who wasn't Dan Feng, he's not sure, and he probably does not care.]
My star killed me again. I felt you hold my hand.
Re: DAY 19 11PM
I... should have helped. I was seeing things. Hallucinating. So I didn't realize...
Re: DAY 19 11PM
Are you all right?
Re: DAY 19 11PM
[he seems earnest enough, if exhausted.]
Re: DAY 19 11PM
[Dan Feng squirms a little bit so he's sitting on the morgue drawer AND wiping off his bloody throat on Dan Heng's clothes (thanks), bracketing Dan Heng's hips with his knees.
He leans in for what seems to be a kiss before he remembers himself.]
Can I kiss you?
Re: DAY 19 11PM
he's surprised by the asking, but only momentarily.]
... Yes.
Re: DAY 19 11PM
[He leans in- to kiss Dan Heng chastely, a peck on the lips.] Does asking make you happy?
Re: DAY 19 11PM
[giving him the teeniest little smile, fond.]
Re: DAY 19 11PM
[He stares, openmouthed, and then averts his eyes from that smile because if he looks at it for more than 0.0004 seconds he will self-immolate and that is a very uncomfortable experience.]
I did not want you to see me like that. Or like this.
Re: DAY 19 11PM
I understand. But... I would rather be able to be here for you than not see.
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