lifeban | MWM Inbox

I know.

[or so he says, anyway. He sliides off of Dan Heng, giving up on crushing him in favour of just hugging him very tight.]

I do not like having fragile places in my mind.

[barnacling to him in turn.]

I know.

[soft and understanding. time to squish his lion.]

Mm. For so long I was at peace with my fate, and yet...

[And yet now he actually has things he's looking forward to. His life is no longer dull nor lonely, and the stagnant feeling that had weighed him down and smothered him has lifted. Local violence aside, he's happy, and that makes him vulnerable -- because now that there's the possibility of a future he actually wants, he's afraid to lose it. Every crack in his emotional armor lets the light shine on his greyed-out world a little more, and at the same time makes it easier for madness to potentially trickle in behind it. And that's leaving aside the plain and simple danger of not thinking clearly enough to protect the people he loves from unnecessary harm.]

...I'm glad. That you aren't at peace with losing the things you've gained, here.

That's sweet of you, but the wise thing to do would have been to keep my feelings to myself in the first place...

...I treasure what you did, in your recklessness.

That was--

[Mmmph. He's just arguing because he's scared and he knows it, so he cuts himself off before he can say something hurtful and tucks his face back into Dan Heng's chest. Don't perceive him he's a mess. A mess who feels quite warm, when Dan Heng says nice things like that.]

[hums a soft noise. acknowledging his restraint. and pressing a kiss to a cute furry ear.]

[The fuzzy ear twitches very cutely, and Jing Yuan whines into Dan Heng's boobs again. This is a good place for his face to be, thank you.]

...You have no idea how long I've watched you from a distance.

...I certainly didn't realize until recently.

[kisses his other ear. chu.]

[That ear also twitches, and then they both lay flat as Jing Yuan's face heats up against Dan Heng's skin. He's embarrassed, but the happy wiggle of his tail exposes his enjoyment.]

Mm. I visit the Express fairly often, actually...

[a pause as he processes that.]

Really? Since when?

Ever since I was released from the alchemy commission.

[Y'know. After the stabbing.]

...And you never said hello?

I thought it was best if I left you alone.

While... visiting the Express.

[with a distinctly guilty tone, because he's forcing himself to confront how pathetic and maybe a little creepy he was being]

...I wanted to be near you, but not to bother you.