...and then he notices what just happened and his ears flatten down in embarrassment.]
The Master Diviner is not ready to be Arbiter-General, and Yanqing is not ready to manage the cloud knights as her right hand. She is rash, and he is still a child. If I choose to leave too soon for my own selfish reasons, anything that happens to them or under their watch that I could have prevented will be my fault.
[places a hand over the one that captured his tail.]
You may be underestimating the Master Diviner... I will not pretend to be more informed than you, but are you sure you'd ever be comfortable enough to leave?
[He's not really arguing. Just pouting. Eventually he rolls onto his back and sighs.]
...Dan Feng will almost certainly want to go back to hunting his own Jing Yuan. I am also unsure if I could weather that. I am too old for all of this.
[He takes a few moments to quietly wrestle with himself here. There are so many reasons to take his loved ones and run, and so many reasons he's resisting putting down his responsibilities. It's a lot to sort through, emotionally.]
...Sett implied an invitation, once. But I doubt it applies to Dan Feng.
[It's going to take a lot more anxious brooding for him to actually get comfortable with the idea, but he's at least willing to put in that work. Especially since Dan Heng framed it as "someplace free of Yaoshi", and Dan Feng deserves that. But, in that vein, since Jing Yuan is an obnoxious overthinker...]
...If Yaoshi's influence was truly removed, surely Dan Feng would be freed from his delirium. Perhaps it would avert my own fate as well, or... that person's condition.
[Y'know. The other marastruck fucker.]
But Yaoshi is the source of our immortality as well as our curse. Even Dan Feng has lived long past when he should have reincarnated. There is a chance that freedom would kill any of us three who obtained it.
[Oh, it would be. That fact makes Jing Yuan both more and less concerned about it.]
Mm. I have mixed feelings about the possibility. It is what he wants most, and Dan Feng likely feels similarly, but I don't know if they'd change their minds if their sanity was offered back to them. As for myself... I am in no hurry to die, but I have made peace with death. It is preferable to mara.
But there is no precedent for this. Perhaps we'd simply be free to carry on as ourselves. Either way... it is something to keep in mind for the future.
[He rolls back over to face Dan Heng, and pulls him into a reeeal tight hug, tail swaying playfully. He's deliberately caught Dan Heng's arms in the hug so he can tease him with a cuddly pin.]
[That earns Dan Heng a very smug chuckle, as Jing Yuan rests his cheek against that horn.]
Hmm... Are you in the mood for more tonight?
[He's being polite but he loves Dan Heng a whole bunch and wants to have some happy, pleasant experiences after a rotten couple of days. He's an excited kitty at this moment. His tail is wiggly.]
[caaaarefully nudging his horn to rub against jing yuan's cheek, with all the caution of someone who cannot see EXACTLY where his horn tip is and values jing yuan's eyes.]
[Cute... Jing Yuan loves being the one to get pinned and beg, but putting Dan Heng in that role also has great appeal. Their preferences are similar anyway, so he knows that the light restraint will only make it feel better when he nuzzles into that horn and licks it again, from the base aaaall the way to the tip.]
[dan heng holds back his shaky moan as best he can, in the name of manners. given their poor cats. but he does just kind of melt bodily in his arms, the shiver of pleasure going all the way along his spine down his tail.]
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Re: relatable
Do you fear they could not manage without you?
Re: relatable
...and then he notices what just happened and his ears flatten down in embarrassment.]
The Master Diviner is not ready to be Arbiter-General, and Yanqing is not ready to manage the cloud knights as her right hand. She is rash, and he is still a child. If I choose to leave too soon for my own selfish reasons, anything that happens to them or under their watch that I could have prevented will be my fault.
Re: relatable
You may be underestimating the Master Diviner... I will not pretend to be more informed than you, but are you sure you'd ever be comfortable enough to leave?
Re: relatable
[turning that into a handhold thx]
...No. I may not ever be able to find contentment in stepping down. And that is where I have reached a stalemate within myself.
Re: relatable
[gently. handholding good.]
Re: relatable
The generals of the Luofu before me were bold and confident prodigies, and they rarely lived a full century before being killed.
Re: relatable
I don't think you can recreate your success. She is not you. But I do suspect she will do much better than your predecessors.
...I do think retiring rather than leaving her the position with your death would be kinder.
Re: relatable
[He's not really arguing. Just pouting. Eventually he rolls onto his back and sighs.]
...Dan Feng will almost certainly want to go back to hunting his own Jing Yuan. I am also unsure if I could weather that. I am too old for all of this.
Re: relatable
You can do better.
I feel the same way, though... I do not wish to leave him, but I do not think I could follow him.
Re: relatable
Mm. ...I was just thinking I may as well take a page out of his book and spirit him away with me, but I don't think our reality deserves that.
Re: relatable
I wonder if we could... take him somewhere outside of Yaoshi's reach.
Re: relatable
...Sett implied an invitation, once. But I doubt it applies to Dan Feng.
Re: relatable
Re: relatable
[It's going to take a lot more anxious brooding for him to actually get comfortable with the idea, but he's at least willing to put in that work. Especially since Dan Heng framed it as "someplace free of Yaoshi", and Dan Feng deserves that. But, in that vein, since Jing Yuan is an obnoxious overthinker...]
...If Yaoshi's influence was truly removed, surely Dan Feng would be freed from his delirium. Perhaps it would avert my own fate as well, or... that person's condition.
[Y'know. The other marastruck fucker.]
But Yaoshi is the source of our immortality as well as our curse. Even Dan Feng has lived long past when he should have reincarnated. There is a chance that freedom would kill any of us three who obtained it.
Re: relatable
[but there's a lot to consider, with that. whether or not it would be a mercy, for one thing...]
Re: relatable
Mm. I have mixed feelings about the possibility. It is what he wants most, and Dan Feng likely feels similarly, but I don't know if they'd change their minds if their sanity was offered back to them. As for myself... I am in no hurry to die, but I have made peace with death. It is preferable to mara.
But there is no precedent for this. Perhaps we'd simply be free to carry on as ourselves. Either way... it is something to keep in mind for the future.
Re: relatable
[snuggles closer.]
Definitely something to think through. But... yes.
Re: relatable
[He rolls back over to face Dan Heng, and pulls him into a reeeal tight hug, tail swaying playfully. He's deliberately caught Dan Heng's arms in the hug so he can tease him with a cuddly pin.]
It is time for me to shower you with affection. ♥
Re: relatable
blinks. snugly (and snuggly) pinned.
and wiggles, just a little, testing.]
Whatever shall I do?
incoming lewd time
Enjoy it, of course.
["It" being Jing Yuan kissing all over the top of his head and his forehead... and then dragging his tongue along one horn.]
Re: incoming lewd time
I can do that-
[he says, agreeably, before there is a hot wet tongue abrupt and intense against his horn and dragging a shocked moan out of him.]
Re: incoming lewd time
Hmm... Are you in the mood for more tonight?
[He's being polite but he loves Dan Heng a whole bunch and wants to have some happy, pleasant experiences after a rotten couple of days. He's an excited kitty at this moment. His tail is wiggly.]
Re: incoming lewd time
Please...
Re: incoming lewd time
[Cute... Jing Yuan loves being the one to get pinned and beg, but putting Dan Heng in that role also has great appeal. Their preferences are similar anyway, so he knows that the light restraint will only make it feel better when he nuzzles into that horn and licks it again, from the base aaaall the way to the tip.]
Re: incoming lewd time
Re: incoming lewd time
Re: incoming lewd time
Re: incoming lewd time
Re: incoming lewd time